Networking Archives - Page 11 of 12 - The Voice of Job Seekers

The Wrong Way to Brown Nose Future Employers

I wonder about the department that hired Raheem. He didn’t possess the right skills for the position. But they hired him any way. When you can’t deliver a sustained competent job performance for your co-workers, it becomes ugly. Fast. Yeah, they fired Raheem.

Raheem got the job where he wanted through networking. He had a positive approach and landed a promotion. There. That would be the bottom-line, but he kissed up to his potential employer. Lots of kissing up. Sucking sounds as in suck-up. Sloppy sounding kissing-up.

Compliments.

“What can I do for you?”

He laughed at lame jokes.

Agreed with everything that was said.

Tried too hard to be friends with everyone in that department.

Once he sent a voicemail blast wishing everyone a great weekend. My friend thought it was great until you heard the quality of the recording, and the fact that he didn’t mention anybody by name. When she saw the light, the saw the forest and trees too.

None of his sucking up was authentic. When people see a fake, it becomes ugly. Fast.

The take-a-ways from this post:

It is never worth selling your soul for a position by being a “Yes” man or woman
Anyone who leaves his or her integrity at the front door, and leaves value. Be explicit in what you can and cannot deliver

He frequently visited our managers to ask how to do spreadsheets , powerpoint presentations, and other duties he did not have the skills for his new department. They helped him for a short time, but they too saw the light. Without going into great detail of how Rahiem was sucked up into a new job, he could not deliver the daily goods. But let me backup second to paint a picture of how I think the interview must have went. Check out this episode of That 70’s show where Eric Forman interviews for a Burger Place.

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The frequent calls to that department, asking to hang out was painful. This was not networking. This turned into shameless requests, and begging. Two years this lasted. The sound of slurping on the phone with them. You can mistaken a sucking sound of a lollipop for as much as talked to them. He unleashed flurries of complimentary adjectives to them, and about them daily. He had no shame. Everyone in the company knew he wanted a job with this one department.

He had lunch with them daily. Not anyone could have lunch with them daily. Nor can anyone infiltrate this department’s fraternal bond. He did.

Rahiem performed decently, as I was the one of the go-to guys in the department, I saw his work frequently. I had no reason to unfairly critique his work. I tried to treat everyone the same, even if he or she kissed-up as means of a promotion.

Rahiem started as a contract employee in the Customer Service Center. From day one, he had aspirations to go elsewhere. And there is nothing wrong with that. All of us knew that customer service was a temporary entry point for some, and a long tenure for others.

Rahiem is hard to dislike, but as a professional brown-noser he made my head hurt. I worked with Rahiem for a few years, and really, his approach was beyond the bounds of nepotism. He had one objective: to suck-up his way to a promotion. Maybe you know Rahiem. You may know Raher, Rahiem’s twin.

I told this story backwards. I found it more interesting to tell the ending first, so that people avoid being Raheim or Raher. Just be you!

About Mark Anthony Dyson

I am the "The Voice of Job Seekers!" I offer compassionate career and job search advice as I hack and re-imagine the job search process. You need to be "the prescription to an employer's job description." You must be solution-oriented and work in positions in companies where you are the remedy. Your job search must be a lifestyle, and your career must be in front of you constantly. You can no longer shed your aspirations at the change seasons. There are strengths you have that need constant use and development. Be sure you sign up to download my E-Book, "421 Modern Job Search Tips 2021!" You can find my career advice and work in media outlets such as Forbes, Inc., Fast Company, Harvard Business Review, Glassdoor, and many other outlets.

by Mark Anthony Dyson

This 43 Year Old Job Seeker Fired Her Friends First

Diane is a 43-year-old job seeker and client that I see now and then. Diane in intentional, organized, and a bit of nerd. She is in no rush to find another job, even after leaving her nursing position, as her boss stated that her services were no longer needed. Unlike many who are let go, she was at peace leaving a job she loved.

Diane was not short on support from her best girlfriends, although, it wasn’t the kind she desired. Toby, one her best long-time girlfriends said, “Girl, I would be upset if that were me. I would cry, scream, yell, and be depressed. They were so wrong in firing you girl.” Toby could not comprehend that Diane left amicably.

Diane celebrated her departure, and never mourned the loss of her job. She visited family, served them, loved them, and cared for them. She works out, got in shape, and looks at least ten years younger. She was taking care of herself.

Another best girlfriend Charlie said, “Diane, how can you be so calm when your child is in college, and you don’t have a job? Girl, aren’t you feeling desperate about now? Shouldn’t you be hitting the street? Shouldn’t you receive unemployment by now?” Charlie couldn’t comprehend that Diane is at peace, and has moved on.

Diane had some savings and is quite secure with her situation. She even joked that only her parents and I understood her goals. Everybody else seems more desperate about Diane’s situation than Diane.

Diane and I have very relaxed coaching sessions, even once when she was on vacation in Miami over the phone (by the way, she was on vacation by herself). Diane determined to step-up her job search– when Diane was ready (she was on vacation by herself).

Sharon was Diane’s lifelong friend, also a nurse was hired and let go by the same doctor a year before Diane left. Sharon said, “Girl, I am suing this man for everything he has! I am going to make him pay! He was wrong! He hurt my career! We should sue him together!” Diane listened to her friend rant about revenge for several days. She called me a couple of days later to request an emergency coaching session over the phone.

Diane: I decided that I need to make three major changes in my life before I start job hunting.

Me: Three? (At that moment, I thought she was going to cancel the rest of her coaching sessions)

Diane: Yes. I am searching for three new friends. I have fired Toby, Charlie, and Sharon. Can I do that?

Diane has since employed new friends, and she has stepped up her job search efforts, as a happier job seeker.

About Mark Anthony Dyson

by Mark Anthony Dyson

Interview with Michelle Lederman, author of The 11 Laws of Likability

Michelle Lederman has written a book that coincides with whom she is, and effortlessly offers advice that she epitomizes. I imagine if I wrote a book called, “How to be Huggable, Lovable, and Squeezable” people will have a pretty high expectation for me to be, well, lovable. I can assure you that I won’t write that book. There are several takeaways from this interview and The 11 Laws of Likability.

Linked In

One attribute that impressed me is her ability to connect with people online. When you look at her Linked In profile she has over 500 connections and has spoken to each person at least once. I asked her during our interview her thoughts on job seekers use of Linked In:

The Law of Authenticity

There are job seekers that I have coached over the years who attempt to become someone else whenever they interview, or during networking events. In Lederman’s book, she says that “Tapping into likability does not mean making everything all perky and bright and constantly being happy. On the contrary, she says to, “Take a deep breath and reconnect with that part of you that feels authentic and honest…”.

Approach People Where They Are

We also talked about how people can really hurt their networking success by approaching awkwardly that appears strategic. This could potentially wear out people who can be helpful. She says that you are “Networking for life, not just for now.”

Go Ahead, Google Yourself

Before I interviewed Ms. Lederman three weeks ago, I had known that she wanted job seekers to “Do enough research that you have a solid base of background knowledge, but don’t go overboard.” Listen to how she responded to me when I told her that I Googled her:

Overall, I have enjoyed talking with her, and tweeting with her. You can reach her via Twitter at @mtlederman and also check out her blog at michelletillislederman.com

DON’T FORGET

Friday is the last day to qualify for a copy of Michelle Lederman’s book, The 11 Laws of Likability. To qualify this week, comment below what you liked about this interview, or Re-Tweet this post via Twitter. I will announce the winner on Monday’s special afternoon post.